Scott Michael

Brother. Son. Uncle. Best friend. He was probably the nicest man you would ever meet. He was smart and funny. He taught me how to treat animals and how to shoot a gun. He had a way with animals and they just instinctively knew that he would never hurt them. Lucky is his dog. Always will be. Lucky and Uncle Scott had the same brown eyes. They were the nicest brown eyes. They could make you feel safe and secure. They made you feel loved. I don't think I will ever be able to look at Lucky without being reminded of my uncle. I'm trying to write this without crying, though it's proving to be a daunting task. I can only get a couple sentances out and then I have to go read something funny my friends did. Oh gosh, what can I even say about him that people aren't already thinking? He never really was one for nicknames, but he called me Squirt. Actually, he called all of us Squirt at first. Eventually though, I became the second shortest in thef amily (besides Abby, she has an excuse) so I was really the only one who was called Squirt. I don't really think I could handle it if somebody were to just call me that. Not only was he my uncle, but he was my friend. A good friend. Probably one of the best I will ever have. He wasn't judgemental, he wasn't mean, and he wasn't perfect. I don't know if he ever really knew how much we really loved and appreciated him, but neither one of us were really the touchy feely type. I wish that I could go back and tell him how important he was to me. I just want everyone to know that no matter what happens or what happened, I will always love you. It's hard to lose someone as amazing as Scott Michael Peacock. Sitting here, writing this, I still haven't fully processed it. I'm sitting here, wishing he would just walk through that door.

Dear Uncle Scott,
I love you.
Love,
Squirt

[Insert Wittyness Here]

I don't really feel like talking about anything deep and meaningful. Shit happens. Life happenED. At least I have my music. Music is everything, and sometimes it's all you've got. For me, music is No Doubt, Halestorm, Karmin, Lady Gaga, Michael Jackson, Volbeat, Shinedown, Taylor Swift (Shut Up. Judge and I kill you.), Carrie Underwook, and Eminem. There are others, but when my uncle died yesterday, I wanted nothing more than to get to know my CDs better. There's just something about opening the case and takeing out the cover, pouring over the lyrics and keeping them close. Yes, I own an iPod. Two, actually. But I have a billion CDs. They're more...personal, I guess.

Sorry this thing is all about music, it's just when people let youdown, or they make you cry, or youjust want to be by yourself, you can just put in The Strange Case Of or Hello. You'll be alone without truly being alone. Music is always there for me and has never let me down. I'm not antisocial, I just...it's hard to explain.

Well in the past 48 hours I've gotting like six hours of sleep. So I bid thee farewell <3

Halestorm

Okay. Sorry for the long wait. I really am. I was really busy working at a haunted house and stuff...Yeah. Anyways.

The Butterfly Project:

1. When you feel like you want to cut, take a marker, pen, or sharpies and draw a butterfly on your arm or hand.

2. Name the butterfly after a loved one, or someone that really wants you to get better.

3. You must let the butterfly fade naturally. NO scrubbing it off.

4. If you cut before the butterfly is gone, you’ve killed it. If you dont cut, it lives.

5. If you have more than one butterfly, cutting kills all of them.

6. Another person may draw them on you. These butterflies are extra special. Take good care of them.

7. Even if you don’t cut, feel free to draw a butterfly anyways, to show your support. If you do this, name it after someone you know that cuts or is suffering right now, and tell them. It could help.

 

 

 

That's my big thing right now. I have two. Because I was there once. It doesn't solve anything though. It's...I can't really explain it. It just feels like it helps. But it doesn't. It makes you feel weak. You're the only person you're hurting by doing that. And it sucks because you feel like you're helping yourself and...ugh. It's a bad place to be.

 

Well. That's all. For now. but remember. Somebody really does care. <3